Ploafmaster General

I have to link to this hilarious post on my friend Alexis' site...SO funny.

Here's a ripe ol' commercial from 80s land:
[youtube [www.youtube.com/watch](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lO4j3wbpZM&w=425&h=350])

Just read a fine piece of humor at a fine site called the nonist.

Chicky-check it.

Holy crap...It's McSweeney's time again, folks.

Read this collection of food reviews, but take particular note of the description of "oven baked brownie squares."

I know I've really been bitin' off McSweeney's lately, but dang it if that site isn't one of the funniest things I've ever read since Sweet Fancy Moses.

So today I just discovered the "verbal cartoons" of Dan Liebert. He seems to be a more sophisticated Jack Handey (not that there's ANYthing wrong with Jack Handey, Alexis :-)).

Read! Enjoy! Wet yourself with laughter!

How do you react in the face of tragedy?

Yes, it's puerile. Yes, it's gross. Yes, I probably shouldn't link to such a base web page on my site, but here I've gone and done it.

Why? Because my wife has been to a bachelorette party, and so have countless other women out there, and if they'll suffer no worse than some blushing faces at the reading of the article, then everyone else can certainly handle it. Fellas, if you're not familiar with the sort of things that happen at bachelorette parties, then crawl out of your hole, read this article, and laugh your fanny off.

When I read this article, I had trouble not laughing out loud in my cubicle. This is some seriously funny shiz.

Aight...amazingly, in one day, I'm putting up the pictures I promised! So here they are:


Dave, showing off his mad scientist kitchen creation.



A close up of MAN PIE!!! A hollowed out crust of bread filled with the following: four-cheese mashed potatoes, turkey, and roast beef. Toppings? The rest of the bread, bacon, and chedder cheese. Sooooooooo good.

Pictures from this past Sunday in Manhattan after the bump...

The Washington Arch in Washington Square Park at the bottom of Fifth Avenue, Manhattan.



Saw this while walking through Manhattan…Still haven’t looked up the website yet, but it’s hilarious enough as is.



Nerd that I am, I had to snap a pic of the new Apple store on 5th Avenue - especially after all the glass architecture in Prague.



A plaque commemorating a nearly forgotten American literary figure, nearly lost in the bustle of Times Square. Sad and unfortunate.


Anyway, that’s all the photonography I have for ya this evening…check out my Flickr account to see the rest o' what I got.

Holy crap, this is hilarious...and still somewhat music related.

[youtube [www.youtube.com/watch](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=56TqnexgzIA&w=425&h=350])

Jason Kottke has posted a delightful account of his resistance to recent pop culture hype.

Justin Timberlake, courtesy of CNN(?!!?!??). Wow.

I wanted (the album) to look to a time when everything was really sexy...Maybe everybody was coked up, but who cares? It was hot. It was all about sex.

Man, everyone shoud listen to Car Talk.  This morning, as Valerie and I were heading to the bank, we heard Click and Clack talking about Wal-Mart's decision to start selling wine.  They had listeners of their show submit suggested name for the, um, Sam's Choice Special.

My personal favorite?

I Can't Believe it's Not Vinegar

Incidently, Fred Hornblower slipped on a banana peel while riding the roller coaster to Texas. While sliding across the waxed recesses of linoleum carpeting, Fred flatulated magnanimously(I can't spell worth carp). Meanwhilst, Papa John's Pizza exploded spontaneously shouting, "You're so incorrigable!" The shining of the sun certainly does illuminate the tombstones across the street, thought the rubber chicken. The prowling feline(the name brand of certain types of canines) spontaneously started jamming with his harpsichord , then he got jiggy widit. Brick outhouses don't smell like roses, because the walls have teeth. We all know that cattle excrement feels odd between skyscrapers. The rat just had a healthy litter of deer. He is right close to this rubber chicken. So is Jerge (pronounced Jerge). The dandruff skipped from flea to flea with exponential forces of equilibrium, producing pungent smelling J curves on the third moon of Nike. The Impropability Ball just grew catnip under its toes within its armpit jam. Nasal fairies met for a Smurf convention with Bo Diddly, and decided it wasn't a brilliant idea to serve tofu slices to acid tripping marmasets. Belly button lint was fed to the rubber chicken. Nose cherries abounded. The chimes rang at the wedding of the neighborhood weightlifting housewife, Cloie and the Naked Cowboy Man.

Mole woman with her flagellum extended, dove into a pool of concrete fish nuggets. After displaying their cool ability to make armpit noises with their teeth, the nuggets burrowed into her skull with a 5/8 inch toenail bit, causing green corpuscules to exude from her pocketbook. At that very instant, the Improbability Ball shot out of nowhere, and ressurrected Sam the Barbarian. Sam, while eating green eggs and ham, crashed into a mental block of worm slime. While pondering the meaning of cheese, Mole Woman discovered Dweezil Zappa falling haphazardly from a petri dish. The bacteria in the petri dish decided to make Mole Woman queen. They lived happily ever after in pestilence and chunky creamed corn.

Jack dreamed of his love affair with the naked cowboy man. What did he have under his hat? Upon exiting the school building, his brain exploded through his ears. Individual chunks of his brain careened through the school yard dodging trees, and large vascilating sea animals. One chunk in particular, landed upon the brow of one(1) very obsequeous mole woman. She immediately proceeded to lick the chunk from her microbe sized greasy forehead by way of a pimpled tongue which protruded from her left tentacle. I thought only boys had tentacles.

One day, Jack decided to get up and go to school as usual. He got out of bed, dressed, and ate breakfast. Finally, he went out the door and walked to school, where he had a perfectly normal day.

Holy my crap, you need immediately to go to Homestar Runner's site and check out this toon.

Make sure you have sound. It's pretty much one of the best toons they've ever done.

Rock rock on.

So I frequent the website Engadget, all about the latest nerdy tech stuff, and they have an article on the site today about this rediculous new weight loss device which uses a vacuum pump to do something or other. The greatest part about this article?

"...Or you could walk outside in this thing and get punched in the gut a few times for looking like a dork. Either way the point is to get your blood moving, so go for the pressure chamber gut hickey if you must."