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Ask Dan is coming for your soul.

Q: Hey ask dan! Here’s my question: How would YOU make crapplejuice as a cocktail and what would it taste like? Please give me your most detailed and goriest explaination. (Holy crapplejuice Batman!)

A: Well it seems that my sister-in-law still likes to see her weirdest questions answered for all to see, and this time, it's a rather disgusting one :-)

First I want to suggest, Elizabeth, that you probably meant "grossest explanation" rather than "goriest" since I doubt you're talking about a bloody crapplejuice cocktail here!

That being said, here's my ancient family recipe for just such a libation:

1.5 oz. Crapple Jack
1.5 oz. Patron Anejo Tequila
4-5 dingle berries - reserve one for garnish
Crapple Juice to taste

To mix: Fill a Boston shaker with ice and add the Crapple Jack and tequila. Shake vigorously. In a rocks glass, muddle all but one of the dingle berries with some crushed ice. When thoroughly pulverized, add more crushed ice to fill the glass halfway. Pour out the contents of the shaker into the glass and top off with Crapple Juice. Garnish with the remaining dingle berry on the rim of the drinking vessel.

There you have it! If you're not dry-heaving after all that, post questions for next time (if there is one) in the comments of this or any future post.