Ask Dan #1

After a fun and humorous discussion with Patrick and Chris B., I decided that I’m going to start a “column” on my site called “Ask Dan.”

This originated because of my apparent ability to talk about any subject. What a lot of people don’t know (but my friends are aware of completely) is that I’m not really that intelligent. I’m just good at SOUNDING like I know what I’m talking about. Speaking with authority, if you will. A major B.S. artist, if you won’t.

What Patrick, Chris, and I came up with was a question/answer feature for a site, and I decided to test it right here. If it stays here, fine. If, by some strange chance it got bigger, I’d make a new site. But I’m guessing the trickle of questions from my loyal four readers will keep it down to a weekly (or monthly) occurrence.

So here’s how it’ll work. I’ll post a stub like this calling for folks to submit questions. I’ll pick a question to answer, no matter how odd or serious, personal, or general. Or Ploafmaster General. My answer, however, will be completely serious and (pseudo)informative. That’s really all the structure I have so far.

Alright then – post your questions in the comments, and check back on Friday for an answer!

5 thoughts on “Ask Dan #1

  1. Every time I see an old person with a fixed facial expression (the snarly-lip is a pretty common one), I feel like asking them what they think they’re looking at. Or imitating their deformity. Or vomiting. Am I a homosexual?

  2. Well, first of all I’d like to respond to Mr. Mugs. I would say with certainty that your conjecture is absolutely correct. Not only that, but I’m in love…with a sheepherder from Iceland name Norvasc, yes like the Medication.Moreover my question relates to that. After recently visiting my sheepherding lover in Iceland I discover a talking, puss spewing cyst on my inner left thigh. It keeps asking if the ninja turtles ever did the Ice-capades. First, how do I make it love me..it reminds me so of my dear Norvasc. Secondly, my arrythmia at night is casing poor sleep. Should I stab myself in the heart when it flairs up?Thanks Dan,Mr. Sharpie Mustache

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